March 2012
I hope Rick Santorum accidentally washes his favorite wool blazer when he decides to do laundry drunk.
I hope Rick Santorum goes to fart in the car as he’s driving away from an epic Sam’s Club run but right after he’s pulled into the on-ramp he realizes there was some poop in the fart and then he gets stuck in traffic for 45 minutes with just slightly poopy underpants.
I hope Rick Santorum goes to step into his sandals when getting out of a hammock but the sandal slides away at the last minute and so he steps on a claw hair clip and gets out of the hammock all awkwardly as a result.
February 2012
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Improvisers Standing Up →
williebhines:
I have created all of my best material while doing this show, I am glad this show exists!
Tomorrow night I will be discussing how it’s the 25th anniversary of mother’s death! Hilarious, right? BUT IT IS! Anyone who’s ever had anything bad happen to them should come and listen to me jerk myself off.
ISU is a great show, founded and helmed by the brilliant Rob Stern, and handed...
“Art is cognitive play. Humans and other intelligent species engage in prolonged...”
– William Deresiewicz in Adaptation: On Literary Darwinism | The Nation, summarizing some arguments in Brian Boyd’s On the Origin of Stories. (via wehr)
Also why sociopaths are bad at making art.
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Thanks for making the search function even less...
Really appreciate that one.
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Posted this originally a few years ago. I like to...
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5 Reasons You Should Never Agree to a Police... →
prolongedeyecontact:
harmreduction:
Scott Morgan, Associate Director, FlexYourRights.org
Whether or not you ever break the law, you should be prepared to protect yourself and your property just in case police become suspicious of you. Let’s take a look at one of the most commonly misunderstood legal situations a citizen can encounter: a police officer asking to search your belongings. Most...
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kelsium:
I realize that posthumously baptizing people is a step beyond, but you all realize that millions of assholes pray for your heathen souls, some of you even specifically, all over the world every Sunday, right? Yeah, it’s arrogant as fuck, but it all means the same amount of nothing.
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insider info: custom suits. →
andthenitripped:
This feels like a weird product placement but it’s not, I promise. I’m in no way beholden to this company, I just want everyone to feel so handsome all day errryday!
I recently interviewed the guys at Enzo Custom Clothiers in Manhattan and holyshitya’ll. They do custom suits for, like, real people. A suit, two shirts and three ties (all made to order) for less than $600? I...
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“The English language is like London: proudly barbaric yet deeply civilised, too,...”
– The Ode Less Travelled (via fuckyeahstephenfry)
That is my favorite part of English!
Apple Fans Throw Steve Jobs Birthday Fete →
stackexchange:
Stack Exchange’s own Seth Rogers was on CNBC this morning, talking about today’s impromptu birthday party for Steve Jobs. If you’re near the flagship Apple Store on 5th Avenue in New York City from 3-5 PM this afternoon, swing by and say happy birthday!
Thanks for making sure we don’t forget about the word fete, CNBC! And come get a free black turtleneck this afternoon!
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Oh for fuck's sake.
30 Rock has been fucking great this season, so has Parks & Rec, WE DON’T HAVE TO COMPARE TELEVISION PROGRAMS THAT HAPPEN TO HAVE FEMALE PROTAGONISTS YOU ASSHOLES, Liz Lemon is a complex comedy character on a comedy program and not a paragon of the Feminist Ideal, women (and other female-identifying people) can be ANYTHING, including flawed and weird and smart and gorgeous, not being into...
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unbornwhiskey:
‘So!’ he said, at length, and it came as a complete surprise to me that fellows ever really do say ‘So!’ I had always thought it was just a thing you read in books. Like ‘Quotha!’ I mean to say, or ‘Odds bodikins!’ or even ‘Eh ba goom!’
Still, there it was. Quaint or not quaint, bizarre or not bizarre, he had said ‘So!’ and it was up to me to cope with the situation on those...
chrisreblogs:
mattlittle:
Thank You, Robot...
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kelsium:
I’m sorry, you didn’t know how invasive subjecting a woman to an unnecessary medical procedure might be? Well go fuck yourself. Oh, sorry. I didn’t know how painful slapping the shit out of you might be.
